NOTE: Someone very dear to me asked me to put this here, and I agreed, so here it is: if you need a trigger warning, then just know that this site, the workbooks, my demeanor, my language, the rawness and depth of emotional exploration is a living, breathing and malleable "trigger warning."

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Despite what you might be thinking, this is not a dating site.

It’s not even a site for showing you how to get the love of your lifetime—at least not in the ways that you’re likely thinking about now or have thought about in the past.

Ultimately, and this is the part that will help you decide whether you want to go any further here at this site:

this site, and all of the workbooks and workshops are all about the belief that if you don’t love yourself, you can forget about finding it “out there.”

You must become the love of your lifetime for yourself, just as you are, for you are the only one that is always with you, and if you don’t or can’t love yourself, just as you are, right now, you simply cannot give what you do not possess.

You must be the love of your lifetime.

Think on that for a moment. 

And if there is nothing else that I have learned, is that when it comes to love, you can’t even receive it from another because, and here it is; you don’t really know what it is, and as a result, even when it arrives, if it arrives, you will most likely mess it up, fuck it up, trounce on it or, in so many ways, completely miss it altogether.

If you don’t agree with this assessment, I completely understand and with that, there’s likely nothing else here for you because everything here is built on that understanding.

You have to love yourself.

This is all about the journey that I began, and then, with the union that is my marriage and life with Sharon, we two share with you how we got here, how we nurture it, the love, one another and the relationship that celebrates us both.

That’s it.

Sharon and I both started, initially uncomfortably and unconsciously with a very simple, but seemingly complex set of questions.

As we both had to do, ask yourself, and answer honestly, what are you looking for, and what are you expecting to have happen if you do find “it?”
 
This site is not designed to be rushed or skimmed. If that’s what you need, you’re in the wrong place.

I cannot make this site and the workbooks appeal to all people. 

Some of you won’t stop scrolling long enough to take a breath, let alone read this homepage or fully engage with what Sharon and I created.

So you’ve stopped long enough to decide whether or not this is for you.

If not, we wish you the best.

If you’re still here, then read on and truly consider what’s shared.
 
That’s it in a nutshell.

We aren't "life coaches" with a certification from a weekend seminar. We are two people who have been through shit. From My suicide attempt in 1994 while I was in the army, to Sharon's two simultaneous cancers (stage 3 cervical and thyroid cancers at the same damn time) and other health challenges, childhood trauma, and just a bunch Of other shit that I'm not going to "list" right here, but through it all, we came out the other side still standing—together.

We wrote these workbooks because we wanted something that spoke to us in ways that didn't revolve around "mystical" language, methods that required a belief in things "out there" and more, we just wanted plain-ass talk that didn't generally insult our intelligence.

That's what this is.

But the deeper truth is, Some of you have no idea who Sharon and I are, let alone what we do. Some of you won’t give a shit, or don’t give a shit, and just want to get on with it and see if what we offer is worth your time and energy. 

SO there's no real reason to trust a damn thing that we say or share.

Still others of you just want tangible “proof.”

That’s fine.

That’s life.

But here it is.

Look, Sharon and I are not here to 'fix' you, and we're sure as shit not here to 'save' you. so If you’re looking for gurus to hand you a magic pill that makes the pain stop, or the relationship better, then you’re in the wrong place.

We don't have that.

What we have is a process that we used to stop our own emotional houses from burning down to the ground when shit went sideways. we share with you what we went through, how we got through it, how we nurture ourselves and one another on a day-to-day basis in such a way as to spend more time happy than feeling fucked-up.
 
That’s life.
 
but if you’re in a “hurry” to get away from something (whatever it might be) or get to something quick and fast, yeah, sorry, that’s not likely going to happen here.

One of the fucking problems with fear, desperation and panic, masquerading as intensity, is that our logical approach to things is somehow above the noise of fear, desperation and panic—it’s a mask many times that hides, even from ourselves, the underlying reasons of our “hurry”.

Being in a “hurry” is a part of the problem. 

When we’re in a hurry, we all miss important shit and find ourselves having to go back and do things, all over again anyway.

 you likely know the loop.

And this is the part that really fucked with my head in ways that I didn’t think I was prepared to accept. What Sharon and I finally understood about all of this living “thing."

We just don’t ever seem to know it while in the midst of the shit we’re dealing with.

there are times when we simply must slow the fuck down.

literally.

Sharon and I built this to follow a specific progression. If you’re going to do this, start here. This is where it begins.

why the progression?

First was Sharon’s cancer diagnoses (Stage 3 Cervical and Thyroid cancers—at the same fucking time), then came the biopsies, then more in depth planning, then the chemo and radiation, the ten surgeries (as the husband, these appointments and surgeries all seemed to blur into one long, painful series of "I feel helpless," but that's truth. That's loving and living).

That’s order. That’s not random.

That’s what life demanded.

so for this work, The first step is "The Mist We Know. The Mist Unnamed."

[Get the Workbook here] (and no, don’t need an email)

If that resonates with you, cool, keep going.

If not, no harm, no foul, you can get on with your life.

By the way—this applies to all of our work. If you want to see the samples, you just download them. No name, no email, no bullshit.